Daddy's and Daughters

I have two teenage daughters. As I continue to write, I'm sure a large percentage of my topics will revolve around them.

My wife has this great relationship with her dad. Worship is not the right word, since my wife reserves that for God, but her dad comes in a close second. I always wanted that kind of relationship with my daughters, but the older they get, the less I believe that will happen.

I think if I had sons, I would feel differently, less protective. They are (would be) boys after all. All you need to do with boys is teach them how to take care of themselves. Toughen ‘em up and turn ‘em loose on an unsuspecting world, and watch them go! Of course, since I have no sons, I am sure I am wrong. Dad’s (good ones anyway) are probably just as protective of their sons as I am of my daughters.

One of the biggest concerns I have is that my girls find the right guy. We live in a suburb of Detroit. Like all big cities, it has it’s share of crime, but the article I read today carried a special chill for me as a father. You might think it was the article about the 11-year-old held hostage for 18 years, but you would be wrong. While that case was tragic, it is hard to imagine something like that happening to my girls. The article that gave me the chill was about a guy who will be nameless for this article, but who I will call Dirtbag

It seems that Dirtbag met a gal in one of our casinos, and the two of them hit it off. A week later, he had her pick him up for their first date. Now all first dates are difficult (getting to know someone is never easy), but this one was beyond what anyone should have to go through. When dinner was through, Dirtbag said he left his wallet in her car and asked her for the keys. Some of you can see it coming…he skipped out on the check, stole her car, and left her stranded.

Now don’t get me wrong…things could have gone so much worse. A restaurant bill and a stolen car are not the worst thing that could happen to a girl (I’m pretty sure she thinks she was lucky now that she knows what kind of man he was). I guess what chills me about the story is that I CAN see that happening to my girls.

As I said in one of my previous blogs, you can’t judge someone by how they look. Weirdo’s come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. As a dad, I am terrified that something like that could happen to one of mine.

As a dad, I want so much to protect them, but I realize that at some point, I can no longer watch out for them. My oldest has a boyfriend that could be a car stealer / check skipper. It has already caused a little strain between us. I decided to step aside and let her figure it out. I am sure it will not last anyway. If I do my job right and raise my girls the way my father in law raised my wife, my daughters will do just fine.

The hardest thing in the world to do, is to let someone you love live their life the way they want to live it. We know so much better how they should live it than they do. There are going to be some skipped checks in life, but they have to go through that don't they?.

Who knows if I am right? After all, all this stuff is just my opinion.

By the way, Dirtbag is (to the best of my knowledge) in the Royal Oak Lockup on charges of Grand Theft Auto. Stay away from my girls when you get out!